CRANLEIGH RFC 2ND XV VS. CHOBHAM

Bridget Sam’s Diary

21/9/23

Dear Diary…

Oh man, Chobham have pulled out! I was excited to see Pete face his daughter’s boyfriend. Will need to use the popcorn for a movie instead. At least he has another few months to live (the boyfriend that is!)

22/9/23

Dear Diary…

Wow, we’re top of the league! I’m going to tell the lads. I feel like something magical is happening. Will post to the WhatsApp group. OMG, THE NEXT MATCH IS AGAINST OLD PAULINES!! My old club! Played for over 10 years, scored over 1,000 points for them (honestly!) and left when I moved to Rudgwick. I NEED A TEAM, A special squad, I wonder who’s around….

22/9/23 (PM)

Dear Diary…

WhatsApp after message goes out…PING, PING, PING!

BANG! CASTY IN. Whoop!

Ben H: I would never leave you!

Jake Shaylor: I’m in baby!

Phil Moore: I’m sooo in it hurts!

Gareth: I’m flying in, put the Cristal on ice.

Jonny Shaylor: umm what time is KO…..(Jonny is typing)……I’M IN!

Dwayne: I want a piece of this!

Russ: I can’t leave my brothers, I’m there!

Dan H.: Bugger if you’re in, I’m in

Mike V.: I’m as ready as a nun in a cucumber factory.

Bouncy: Throw me in, sweet cheeks!

The replies kept coming. Then, like the return of the Mac, James Moore: Yes, I shall play…well a half anyway.

I cried. The names, the passion, the Shaylors, the Moores, the team sheet. It’s still a week away!

24/9/23

Dear Diary…

Mozza is trying to repair himself, I think he might play.  How is this happening? Pete might be around! Don’t get your hopes up! But Diary I am, secretly.

It’s Sunday night and I’ve still got 6 days to go…..I’m worried I won’t sleep! I might clean my boots now and get my kit ready.

26/9/23

Dear Diary…

Saw Mike Verbrugge at the school gate, giggling like little kids about the squad. Do I even have kids at this school…does Mike?

27/9/23

Dear Diary…

Oh Diary, it’s a bad day. Mozza and Quicky are out. Worst day ever! I feel like a plane without my wings, what would Maverick do? “Don’t think Sam, just do!”

What? Is Andy Castle out too? Mummy said big boys don’t cry…

OH, MAN! Old Paulines have pulled out! That’s it. I’m going to Toys R Us, sitting in a pram, and throwing toys everywhere!

29/9/23

Dear Diary…

YES, GARETH has found a fixture! Yikes, it’s against Chobham 2s/3s. Hold tight….Pete. B is back! Andy Castle wants to play, one-shoulder-Kurt is in and giving a debut to his young mate Harvey. Two amazing colts are with us, the impressive Mikey & Marcus. I’m excited! My wife can’t stand me talking about rugby anymore…. I’ll “TRY” my best!

30/10/23

Dear Diary…

GAME DAY! Wake up super early and nudge my wife, “Sarah, I’m excited!” She says, “It’s not your birthday.” What does she mean? Weird. I get up to iron my shirt and watch “Living with the Lions”.

Turn up to the ground, leaving Sarah with everything to do, I massively owe her. Maybe a picture of me playing rugby will do it. Yeah, she’s bound to be pleased with that.

I’m at the ground and the changing room is full of faces I just want to hug and kiss! All the Shaylors, all the Moores, truly. I think this is heaven.

The match kicks off and it’s a brilliant start Diary, guess who opens the scoring? That’s right! Phil Moore. The man storms over and is SUCH a strong ball runner all day. He breaks the line, every time! The Shaylors Bros were bossing the centres and with Dwayne playing like an orchestra conductor, it was all going to plan. A driving run from me (yes Dairy, me!) came just short and Charlie Pankhurst, who went on to be given MOM by Chobham, piled over. The forwards were IMMENSE! Like unreal. I’m going to name them all as they deserve it.

Jake ‘Unstoppable’ Shaylor, Mike ‘Animal’ Verbrugge, Phil ‘Ragin Bull’ Moore, Ben ‘Golden Eagle’ Hurst, Max ‘Thunder & Lighting’ Cheesmar, Charlie ‘Rhino’ Pankhurst, Harvey ‘Smooth Operator’ McCullen, Casty ‘Enforcer’, Gareth ‘Comeback Kid’ Stingemore, Pete ‘Love of my Life’ Barraud.

The thing is, Diary, and Chobham were good. A mix of 2s & 3s, we had a tough test. They had quality, they are quality, but the heart of the Cranleigh team was beating, pumping even! Cue Jonny Shaylor racing across for try saving tackle number 1 of the day, as their impressive winger sped away. He hunted and caught his prey with a diving tackle. What was strange was after his awesome tackle, a noise that sounded like he was giving birth to a calf. Well, they do call us The Farmers. The physio was sent away and a vet was summoned. I’m pleased to say both Jonny and the baby calf are doing well. Privacy has been requested at this time.

Mikey (or Mickey as I ran around calling him) was electric at scrum half and with Marcus, who usually is a flanker, at centre, both were adding quality and youth to an experienced team. Kurt and Rob Warzee on the wing had one of their best games and were as good in defence as in attack. As Kurt departed, local legend Steven Bosscual entered the frame to add some showboating.

Pete, as per usual, scored his try which was converted by myself. Chobham came back but with James Moore now on the pitch for his comeback tour, Abbey watched eyes wide and wondering if the next 24 hours were going to be spent in Royal Surrey. James did the sensible thing and on his first touch took a crash ball. He lived and so did his marriage. Flowers in the post.

The match was cheered by a sell-out crowd and as Russ Shaylor broke the line, Charlie was on hand to score number 2 for the day. The match finished 22-12 and the mighty 2s train leaves the station for Guildfordians. No train strikes here baby!

1/10/23

Dear Diary…

I wish every week was like that.

Love Sam.